Season 14 – Eintracht Frankfurt, German Bundesliga

We got off to a good start in the pre-season. Massive amounts of turmoil caused by a few troublemakers in the dressing room.

This wiped out my support from the squad and destroyed team cohesion, and what’s more is I couldn’t shift the players who’d turned people against me. I also missed out on key targets waiting for funds for other transfers to come in as buying clubs dithered and the board wouldn’t help me out. C*nts.

I did get pulled in for a meeting about the squad situation at one point but survived with relative ease. Rangers interviewed me again and with the state we were in, I found it even harder to turn them down than last time, but the scale of the rebuild there would have been enormous for the money on offer.

Onto the real business, we did actually start well in the league. We very early on established ourselves in the running for the top four, and apart from a minor wobble in November – a 4-1 f*cking off Dortmund at the Westfalenstadion and an unexpected 3-2 defeat at home to Koeln – we managed to stay there for pretty much the whole season.

They were the only consecutive defeats all season in a year that saw us break club records for wins and points, with 22 and 70 respectively.

In the Champions League, we drew Barcelona, Chelsea and Roma. Magic. Lost both games against Barca, drew in London, did the double over Roma and lost 5-4 in a must-win game against Chelsea which dropped us into the Europa League. And of course, we drew fucking Rangers, who dumped us out despite a 2-0 win in the home leg.

Bayern put us out of the quarter final of the Cup around this time too.I think this might be my last season here.

The players still don’t fully like me again and we’re at least five years away from catching Bayern, who finished up with a two digit lead again.